There’s this asshole who every time he sees me with my ukulele he thinks he’s funny and asks “Can you play any Metallica?” but the joke is now on him because I just learned how to play the intro riff to Master of Puppets.
I did it. I fucking did it. He asked me again just like I knew he would and I stared him straight in the eyes without blinking and just fucking shredded on my ukulele
When you’re feeling down and out, REAL friends be like
okay but the guy in blue gets up and hold onto the back of the red guys shirt like a small child or perhaps a duckling
friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?
me: i don’t have money
friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay